Stupid joke FRIDAY

[Milwaukee Midget]

Dropping the jokes for a minute - we haven't heard from Jerry in better than a month.

Jerry - I hope you're okay.

Chris

[fastesthonda_jim]

I hope you're not complaining.  Almost a month without him pun-ishing us is... is.... well, actually I do miss him too
Jerry?
Jerry?!
In the meantime since there is no one to, ummm... take the bait, let Rodney Dangerfield do it for you with some of the best one liners I've ever heard him say, like (to paraphrase), "I don't want to say she was easy, but her high school yearbook picture was horizontal."
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=738VLg7JJ2k
Enjoy... until Jerry gets back.
Knapp

[Robin UK]

A man walks up to entrance of the London Olympic Stadium carrying a really long case and asks a guard to let him in.

"Are you a pole-volter?" the guard asks.

The man replies "No, I'm German actually; but how did you know my name was Walter"

Robin

[fordboy628]

Only 4 days until Cinco de Mayo.

I'm wondering, is the de Mayo, the Mexican Titanic?

[fordboy628]

My health insurance is so bad I have to go to the Cinco de Mayo Clinic . . . .

[Robin UK]

How did the Germans get rid of their aristocracy? Von by Von.

Robin

[USFRAMONTE]

A scientist is having a chat with God. The scientist tells God that he is no longer needed as science has progressed to the point that they can grow human organs and
3D print ears, noses and other body parts. God replys by asking the scientist if he is up for a challenge, the scientist says, "Bring it on".  God then says to the scientist, "I challenge you to make a human from dirt".
The scientist says, "No problem". He then bends down and picks up a handfull of dirt. God looks at him and says, "Use your own dirt!".

[USFRAMONTE]

I miss Jerry as well.  Hope everything is okay.

[Milwaukee Midget]

This one is for our MIA friend in Michigan - Jerry.

The family next door all have first names that are also names of cities.  Bennington was on the high school football team, Seattle is a cheer leader, Olathe heads up the college debate team, the mother's name is Phoenix.

The old man stopped by after the hardware store had closed.  He was painting the fence and had run short of primer.

He asked if I had any paint, to which I replied,

"I've got a gallon, Kalamazoo".   

[Robin UK]

Here's a bumper sticker for all you Democrat voters out there.

Robin

[Milwaukee Midget]

Here's a bumper sticker for all you Democrat voters out there.

Robin

My disappointment with Bill was his revelation that he didn't inhale.

It was then that I realized we'd elected a guy so stupid, he didn't even know how to smoke a joint.

[salt27]

Here's a bumper sticker for all you Democrat voters out there.

Robin

That sucks.   

[USFRAMONTE]

Methinks Monica may have blown Hillary's chances.

[tauruck]

He he he.

[salt27]

Methinks Monica may have blown Hillary's chances.

Or it may have given her a HEAD start.