Jokes Saturday thru Thursday

Started by Stan Back, November 26, 2016, 10:01:07 AM

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floydjer

#60
February 15, 2022, 10:47:44 AM
Stolen from Reader's Digest....This whole spring forward thing would be more fun if we set our clocks ahead at 2p.m. on Monday... :friday
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

floydjer

#61
May 07, 2022, 11:48:27 AM
This weasel walks into a bar....Bartender asks what the weasel would like to drink....."Pop" goes the weasel..... 
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Speed Limit 1000

#62
May 07, 2022, 10:55:24 PM
Why couldn?t the lizard get a girlfriend?

Because he had a reptile dysfunction!
John Gowetski, red hat @ 221.183 MPH MSA Lakester, Bockscar #1000 60 ci normally aspirated w/N20

floydjer

#63
May 08, 2022, 11:40:06 AM
Guy walks into a bar with a small lizard on his shoulder and says he would like a beer and a coke for "Tiny".... Bartender says " Named him Tiny eh" and the guy replies..."Yes..he is my newt" :cheers:
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Stainless1

#64
May 08, 2022, 05:29:36 PM
So if your newt is smaller than my newt does that mean that my newt is actually large...

Yes Jerry... I have been drinking tonite....
Stainless
Red Hat 228.039, 2001, 65ci, Bockscar Lakester #1000 with a little N2O

mc2032

#65
May 08, 2022, 05:34:30 PM
A guy walks into a bar with a frog on his head.  The bartender asks, " What's up with the frog on your head?".  The frog says, "It started with a lump on my butt".
#1032 1350 A, APS-PBG & F, #1000 I/BFL.  My number is 241.273.

WOODY@DDLLC

#66
May 08, 2022, 05:59:13 PM
I heard it was a toad and it started with a wart on his a##!  :-P
All models are wrong, but some are useful! G.E. Box (1967) www.designdreams.biz

floydjer

#67
May 08, 2022, 06:20:41 PM
A Marine drill instructor walks into a bar and orders everyone around....
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

floydjer

#68
May 08, 2022, 06:22:29 PM
A corn stalk walks into a bar and the bartender asks if he would like to hear a joke..."I am all ears" exclaims the stalk...
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

floydjer

#69
May 11, 2022, 06:35:30 PM
Bad news...They are not making yard sticks any longer....
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Stainless1

#70
May 11, 2022, 08:04:42 PM
Quote from: floydjer on May 11, 2022, 06:35:30 PM
Bad news...They are not making yard sticks any longer....

As a ruler I only need to get my foot in the door anyway
Stainless
Red Hat 228.039, 2001, 65ci, Bockscar Lakester #1000 with a little N2O

floydjer

#71
May 12, 2022, 04:47:44 AM
Gingerbread man tells his doctor his foot hurts...Doc. asks if he has tried icing it....
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

salt27

#72
May 12, 2022, 10:08:26 AM
So, when you lick the icing off of a spoon would that be considered defrosting it?

floydjer

#73
May 16, 2022, 12:06:17 PM
Seems like people do not name sons Lance anymore....🤔 Back in medieval times, They named sons Lance alot.👶
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

floydjer

#74
June 13, 2022, 03:21:20 PM
I wonder if anyone will ever find the cure for anorexia....Seems like it would be a piece of cake......
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.
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