Stupid joke FRIDAY

USFRAMONTE · December 20, 2013, 08:46:04 AM

Quote from: floydjer on December 20, 2013, 04:33:47 AM
I thought the wife would be pleased to repair my torn jeans....Or sew it seams.................

Can't remember if I posted this one before?
What is the difference between a sewing machine and a kiss?

One sews seams nice, and the other seems so nice!

USFRAMONTE · December 20, 2013, 08:47:24 AM

What is brown and sits on a piano bench?

Beethoven's first movement!

bbarn · December 20, 2013, 11:04:06 AM

What's brown and sounds like a bell?

Dung!

Freud · December 20, 2013, 04:43:50 PM

The guys at the barber shop asked me what actress I

would like to be stuck in an elevator with.

I told them the one who knows how to fix elevators.

I'm old, tired, and pee a lot.

FREUD

floydjer · December 27, 2013, 04:45:59 AM

I`ve decided to learn sign language......I think it will come in handy..........................

USFRAMONTE · December 27, 2013, 09:12:14 AM

If Virginia wore Georgia's New Jersey, what would Delaware?

Idaho, Alaska.

Sorry, I'm running out of material!

Seldom Seen Slim · December 27, 2013, 09:26:34 AM

We're not sorry -- that you're running out of material.

mitchell968 · December 27, 2013, 09:42:03 AM

a man buys a car for his wife for christmas . "i dont like it " she says. " i want something that will go from 0-140 in 3 seconds. so he comes back with a set of bathroom scales and says "stand on this ,sweetheart ". whats the smallest part of a fiat ? the owners brain.

floydjer · December 27, 2013, 09:49:28 AM

Quote from: Seldom Seen Slim on December 27, 2013, 09:26:34 AM
We're not sorry -- that you're running out of material.

Speak for yourself Slim....................Monte...Google "stupid jokes"

USFRAMONTE · December 27, 2013, 03:50:44 PM

Jerry,
As difficult as it is to keep up with you, I will have to make one of my new years resolutions to find some new material.

floydjer · January 03, 2014, 05:45:37 AM

How do snails fight??...They slug it out

floydjer · January 03, 2014, 05:49:44 AM

Two snowmen are standing in a yard when one of them says to the other...." Do you smell carrots " ?

fastesthonda_jim · January 09, 2014, 12:44:54 PM

I'd post a joke but the Ford guys can't read wrds more than 4 ltrs. This is a good bit.
http://biggeekdad.com/2010/12/blackberry-not-working/
His look at 1:53 is pric eles s

floydjer · January 10, 2014, 05:22:07 AM

I was thinking about becoming a vegetarian......But that may be a huge missed steak.....................

bbarn · January 10, 2014, 05:42:06 AM

What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? ... Make me one with everything!

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Stupid joke FRIDAY