Stupid joke FRIDAY

Seldom Seen Slim · May 30, 2014, 11:48:38 AM

Hey -- did you hear about the constipated plumber? He worked it out with a pipe wrench.

4-barrel Mike · May 30, 2014, 11:56:33 AM

Strange, my plumber uses a snake.

jdincau · May 30, 2014, 12:15:01 PM

My accountant uses a pencil.

Seldom Seen Slim · May 30, 2014, 12:21:58 PM

Back in the olden days a constipated scientist would have worked it out with a slide rule.

4-barrel Mike · May 30, 2014, 12:38:15 PM

The local metal-fab guy uses a hammer and a Dolly.

floydjer · May 30, 2014, 01:28:33 PM

Just got home from fishing......................My buddy tried to show me pics of his kids and I dropped his wallet into the lake....a big ol` fish came by and grabbed it...he swam a few feet and passed it to another fish....Who then swam a few feet and passed it off again. First time in my 56 years I`ve ever seen..... Carp to carp- walleting. (whole new scale to this thread)

Stan Back · May 31, 2014, 08:17:57 AM

That one floored me.

RidgeRunner · May 31, 2014, 09:10:13 AM

Looked, swam, and smelled fishy to me............

Ed

salt27 · May 31, 2014, 09:30:50 AM

It sounded like a "pile" to me, I'm sure he was "stretching" it a bit.

fastesthonda_jim · May 31, 2014, 08:53:14 PM

Shortest shaggy dog story I've heard in a long time.

floydjer · June 06, 2014, 05:54:15 AM

NEWS FLASH....Thieves broke in to the Skandia ,Mich. Police Dept. and stole the toilets. Cops have nothing to go on.................

Seldom Seen Slim · June 06, 2014, 06:08:34 AM

Ha, ha, hah! The joke's on you, Jerry. There's no such thing as a Skandia Police Department. The Marquette County Sheriff sends a car down our way once in a while.

Now for a true story: A few years ago I was talking with one of the deputies ( a brother-in-law of my daughter). He asked where we live and I told him that we're on the Dukes Road. He raised his eyebrows and said "We've never been down that road. Never had a call to go there. I'll check with the State Troopers and see if they know where it is."

Ah, the beauty of isolation.

floydjer · June 06, 2014, 06:30:09 AM

Oh yeah??...Well then...A Neutron walks in to a bar and orders a beer....Bartender sets the drink down and the neutron asks " How much"? bartender says " For you..??....No charge "

bbarn · June 06, 2014, 06:49:35 AM

Quote from: floydjer on June 06, 2014, 06:30:09 AM
Oh yeah??...Well then...A Neutron walks in to a bar and orders a beer....Bartender sets the drink down and the neutron asks " How much"? bartender says " For you..??....No charge "

That was positively appropriate for SJF!

floydjer · June 06, 2014, 07:28:47 AM

..........I know...This thread feels like ohm to me.................

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Stupid joke FRIDAY