Stupid joke FRIDAY

Started by floydjer, March 20, 2009, 08:11:27 AM

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fordboy628

#2355
February 20, 2015, 06:55:15 AM
Quote from: Milwaukee Midget on February 20, 2015, 06:51:49 AM
Quote from: floydjer on February 20, 2015, 06:34:52 AM
Quote from: Milwaukee Midget on February 20, 2015, 06:24:17 AM
Quote from: floydjer on February 20, 2015, 06:18:37 AM
My cat refuses to play cards with me...he says I`m a cheetah............

You're lion . . .
No wait...it`s because of a claws in his contract............
I suppose he's feline fine about that.

It's a doggone shame what's happened to this thread . . . . . .    :roll:
Science, NOT Magic . . . .

I used to be a people person.  But people changed that relationship.

"There is nothing permanent except change."    Heraclitus

"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."     Albert Einstein

floydjer

#2356
February 20, 2015, 07:01:06 AM
We`re on topic...You`re barking up the wrong tree................... :cheers:
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Milwaukee Midget

#2357
February 20, 2015, 07:07:09 AM
Quote from: floydjer on February 20, 2015, 07:01:06 AM
We`re on topic...You`re barking up the wrong tree................... :cheers:

That's not what your paw said.

Kate has cats.  

I don't, but Kate does.

One night I woke up to meowing and howling from the kitchen.

Seems one had gotten locked up in a cupboard, and was scared to death.

I had no idea he was clawstrophobic . . .
"Problems are almost always a sign of progress."  Harold Bettes
Well, I guess we're making a LOT of progress . . .  :roll:

floydjer

#2358
February 20, 2015, 07:26:44 AM
I think Chris has a list he re-furs to........................................( I am so paw-some ) :cheers:
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Milwaukee Midget

#2359
February 20, 2015, 07:29:41 AM
Quote from: floydjer on February 20, 2015, 07:26:44 AM
I think Chris has a list he re-furs to........................................( I am so paw-some ) :cheers:

I keep it in the clawset.
"Problems are almost always a sign of progress."  Harold Bettes
Well, I guess we're making a LOT of progress . . .  :roll:

floydjer

#2360
February 20, 2015, 08:20:30 AM
Big clawset or just a litter one???
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Milwaukee Midget

#2361
February 20, 2015, 08:26:19 AM
Quote from: floydjer on February 20, 2015, 08:20:30 AM
Big clawset or just a litter one???

STOP KITTEN AROUND WITH ME!
"Problems are almost always a sign of progress."  Harold Bettes
Well, I guess we're making a LOT of progress . . .  :roll:

floydjer

#2362
February 20, 2015, 08:54:27 AM
Meow Chris is yelling....Purr-fect.
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

floydjer

#2363
February 20, 2015, 08:55:24 AM
Once he calms down, We`ll hiss and make up...............
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

USFRAMONTE

#2364
February 20, 2015, 09:07:41 AM
It's time to paws this!

floydjer

#2365
February 20, 2015, 09:30:55 AM
Did i mention that my cat plays guitar??  he`s a mew-sician.
I`d never advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone...But they work for me.

Milwaukee Midget

#2366
February 20, 2015, 09:51:43 AM
Quote from: floydjer on February 20, 2015, 09:30:55 AM
Did i mention that my cat plays guitar??  he`s a mew-sician.

Guitar players are tough to categorize.
"Problems are almost always a sign of progress."  Harold Bettes
Well, I guess we're making a LOT of progress . . .  :roll:

Robin UK

#2367
February 20, 2015, 09:53:07 AM
One of those very rare German jokes:

Q. Why is there no aspirin in the jungle?

A. Because it would not be financially viable to attempt to sell pharmaceuticals in the largely unpopulated rainforest.

:cheers:

Robin

Robin UK

#2368
February 20, 2015, 09:55:40 AM
There are 10 sorts of people in this world:

Those who understand the binary system and those who don't.

Robin

Podunk

#2369
February 20, 2015, 04:10:24 PM
Quote from: Milwaukee Midget on February 19, 2015, 09:17:14 PM
It's already Friday in parts of Michigan - so before I forget . . .

Got back from my medical exam.  What a fiasco.

Right in the middle of the procedure, a newspaper editor came running into the room, pulled out a red pen, marked up my chart and ordered the procedure stopped.

So I only received a semicolonoscopy.
What kind of halfass remark is that?
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