Stupid joke FRIDAY

[floydjer]

i saw an alligator wearing a vest.....he must have been an investigator

[floydjer]

What is red and smells like blue paint?.....................Red paint.

[doug odom]

This from my 9 year old grand daughter.

A girl hands her teacher a blank piece of white paper and says it is a picture of a cow eating grass.
The teacher says " I don't see any grass."
"The cow ate all the grass".
The teacher says " I don't see the cow".
"There was no more grass so the cow left".

[Peter Jack]

If I am what I eat, then I'm cheap, quick and easy!!!

Pete

[maguromic]

What do you get from a  pampered cow?  spoiled milk  Tony

[floydjer]

I quit my job at the recycling company...........They had me crushing cans ,and it was soda pressing..................

[maguromic]

I had an old girlfriend of mine, when visiting someone new, immediately scans their bookshelves for a copy of Canterbury Tales. If she finds it, she throws it at someone and yells "LOOKOUT! FLYING CHAUCER!"  Tony

[floydjer]

You guys CAN start without me.................................I`m reading a book about anti-gravity and I  can`t put it down.   

[Milwaukee Midget]

You guys CAN start without me.................................

We've tried that, but the jokes wound up being funny. 

Sooo . . . you first, Jerry! 

Ohhhh . . . .

[Glen]

The propster running his car instead of his mouth

[floydjer]

Hey Chris.................I`ll be doing a theatrical performance about puns. It`s a play on words.........................

[JustaRacer]

I was going to tell a chemistry joke, but all the good ones argon.

[maguromic]

Conner takes his visiting Scottish cousin to a baseball game. Baseball is new to the Scot, so Conner is explaining the game as it goes. The visiting team's pitcher throws four bad pitches, and the batter tosses his bat toward the dugout and strolls to first. The Scot jumps up and shouts: "Run, man, run!". Conner pulls him down and explains: "No, he gets to walk, he has four balls." The Scot jumps up and shouts: "Walk with pride, man, walk with pride!"  Tony

[floydjer]

I was going to tell a chemistry joke, but all the good ones argon.

.......Stick with monorail jokes......Those are good one-liners.

[Kevin G]

Sometimes I fondly think back on how long it took me to eat a tire. It was a Goodyear